It doesn't look like Humbaba is with us tonight. Either that or he's gotten so excited he's lost his head...again. You know, he starred in one of my favorite films: Humbaba and the Forty Thieves. You remember that one? A great flick from Meso. Anyway, we'll FedAxe his award to him.

Our next award is new this year. It replaces the old Most Elusive Performance award, which is why Yeti isn't nominated tonight. They wanted to call it the Most Spectacular Dive by a Monster in a Leading Role, but the Academy was afraid Esther Williams would have that category sewn up..

So, the nominees for Soggiest Performance by a Monster in a Lead Role are:

• Squidgie the Giant Squid in "Nobody Knows the Water I've Seen"
• Kappa in "Swimming with Lawyers"
• Nessie in "All by Myself"
• and the Kraken for "Dangerous When Wet."