As some of you may know, I have not been over excited by the prospect of my 19 year old son who just graduated from high school and is about to start college, becoming a father. I was heart broken when he told me the news, most importantly because he didn't care enough about himself or Manda to use protection, and I taught him better than that, and then when I had to come to grips with it, I worried even more, because he doesn't even take care of his dog, I do it, he doesn't have a stable job and he still asks mom and dad for money, the list is endless.
I know that I'm going to be a grandmother at the tender age of 43 and I've slowly come to grips with that, but, I wouldn't allow myself to get excited, I've even gotten irritated by people who have congratulated me. I didn't feel I should be congratulated because my son is an idiot, and yet the past three days have softened me and I owe it all to two of my nieces. They are 7 and 10, my sister had to go out of town for work and Kiowa and Aolani stayed with us, I forgot how much I missed having little one's and the joy that just being around a child brings. These two made me laugh so much, and retaught me patience as well, but the love the joy and the entertainment helped me realize that yes, I wish my grandson would have come later when my son is ready to raise a child, but, I'm actually getting excited about my new baby, the little boy who gave us the peace sign in his ultra sound is sure to bring us love beyond measure! I feel bad for his mom because that boy has a big old head just like my kids did!!
I just can't help but ponder at how funny life is, babysitting my nieces helped me realize that I am and should be exicted about my grandson, I just don't have to like the timing.
I'll shut up now :-)

There are times in life when you question or pray to the power's that be that you believe in, my husbands accident has been a faith reaffirming experience despite the crazy pitfalls that have hit us. It seemed for a long time that God was toying with us, if you're a skeptic, I'm not but my husband is, he's always why me? I'm always why not me and how can I turn it around? My husband's accident took away our primary source of transportation, my son blew up my truck last spring just before my dad gave him a truck, so we were dependent upon my son for transportation, not to mention, my husband and son are the bread winners. I'm a stay at home shuffle my daughter around kind of mom. My son hasn't worked in months, he was finally called back two weeks ago, (he only does part time because of school) but we thought maybe we could pay some bills, then last week, his truck blew up!! Now we have a deisel that my son has been working on, things have gone bad and wrong, but, God sent us a little bit of snow that my son could plow with the deisel when it was working (no wipers, lights drained the battery, so on and so forth, it was crazy) the bills were mounting, hubby was fixated on shut off's and I was hoping for the best, (he hates when I do that, he doesn't think that way), then our son got the deisel working, and God sent us a freaking blizzard!! We got nearly two feet of snow and my son was plowing his heart out Thursday through Saturday. He was tired, he helped people in ditches for free, and we managed to make enough money to get close to paying up our bills for now. And in the mean time it's really pretty outside, I guess my point is this, don't ever think the worst, but hope for the best, because God will provide, that's what makes life funny. Just when you think it can't get any worse, sunshine pops up.

My nephew recently returned from serving in Iraq, he and his unit survived numerous and countless ambushes, and by the grace of God, they all came home, minus one. (The one died in a non combat accident). Just yesterday I got a call from my sister who told me a young man who had served with my nephew had been killed in a car accident. He just turned 20 years old. My heart immediately went out to his family and loved ones. To me this is one of life's cruel ironies, you can go fight a war, dodge IED after IED and come home and die in an accident. If you believe in prayer, please pray for the family of Spc Madison.
Update
I talked with my sister today, she told me Spc Madison was buried with full Military honor's, as it should be. My nephew was his Sargent and was a pall bearer. There were many, many people there, I'm sure a lot of them were military, this took place I believe on the same day that our local Lima company returned home. So it was a day of mourning and of celebration.To the soldiers who have returned, thank you and we love you, and to the families who have had to bury their young. We love you and pray for you. And to all, thank you for your sacrifice.

Did you know cat's can get breast cancer? I never did. Then my ten year old cat got this disgusting seeping, stinky sore on her belly. I tried treating it with peroxide and neosporin, but, eventually, I had to give up the fight and take her to the vet. Which took a lot of effort because my hubby was taught to put animal's down not cure them.So, I take her and I learn, she had breast cancer! Can you believe that?!! She did have a kind of mastectomy, (the offending breast removed) and had to be fixed so she would quit producing estrogen and lessen her chances at getting another tumor. 600 smackeroo's! It took a lot of brow beating from me and my daughter to get the money out of hubby to get it done, but, in the end, she got her surgery and nearly a year later she is healthy and happy. I am the only person I know that had a cat with breast cancer, I'm going to have a find a pink ribbon to hang on this post, lol. Told ya, life is funny.

Okay, I got my pink ribbon, but before ya'll think I'm making light of cancer rest assured, I am not! My husband's aunt is a survivor, my best friends sister in law is a survivor, and our family lost a dear friend to breast cancer, just thought it was crazy that animals got it too. And I would like to add that my sister devotes her career and life to cancer research.October is breast cancer awareness, so give if you can, we need to find a cure.

Update, I guess I wrote the words too soon about my cat Paulie, just two days ago, I found new lumps on her belly, a few were near the incision site from her surgery last year, but, there is at least one on a nipple site and one under her armpit. My sister says they could be scar tissue and just abnormal lumps on an old girl...but, I think the writing is on the wall. Now you all must think I'm nuts worrying about my cat with breast cancer...and you might be right. But she was born in this house, I watched her be born. I love all of my animals, the 5 dogs, 4 cats, the lamb and the goat, but, my Paulie is the one we had the longest, my daughter and I love her too much, and I'm scared..I will make an appointment for her when my vet returns next week.